Faithfulness

So my devotional is really good.  Although I can't do it everyday because of how hard it is to bring back things to my remembrance, this one that I just did was so good.  It talks about the pit of innocence, how I can end up in it before I even knew what hit me.  When this type of pit comes it can be very complicated to deal with emotional and spiritually.  The things in my life that have innocently thrown me into this pit are Abbott suffering from a mental illness,Abbott's disease, Abbott being a special needs child, and the death of a my baby Abbott. But God has reminded me of His faithfulness, that I need to trust Him and that He loves me. The truth does indeed set us free-truth about how difficult and painful certain chapters of our lives have been and truth about how God can and absolutely redeems those times.  I have been in a pit, and I cry out to God to get me out. I didn't deserve this one bit, just like Joseph didn't deserve to get thrown into the pit by his brothers.  But I remain to keep looking up, it is hard to be reminded that I no longer have Abbott in my arms.  Just last week was one of the most painful weeks I could have ever endured.  Last week was a mark that it has been exactly two years since Abbott was diagnosed and had his first brain surgery.  Little did I know at that time what kind of journey I was going to be traveling on.

Here we were holding on to Abbott, and now I can feel Heaven Holds me and I am in His hands. Even though my world has shaken Heaven stands.  These are a couple of lyrics from different songs and they are really getting me through this time without getting to hold Abbott.  I know that Abbott is my future and I will one day see him again.

Supernatural

This year will be Casey's and mine supernatural year.  The Lord is going to help me regain a sense of hope for the future, wonder at the gift of life, and joy in His amazing grace and Love for me. 

Casey and I got the privilege to hear Dr. Sevelle come speak at our church.  He truly brought a message from God.  His message really opened my eyes to see things a little more clearly in life.  As I was going back over all my notes from last night and reading John 16 it started making more sense.  He will show us things to come. 

John16:13 says, " When the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all the truth.  For He will not speak on His own, but He will speak whatever HE hears.  He will also declare to you what is to come." 

Further into the chapter Jesus talks about how my sorrow will turn into joy and my heart will rejoice and NO ONE will rob me of my joy. I am so thankful that we serve an amazing Father that will restore my heart again and who gives me a hope and future. I believe that my NOW has come and that Enough is Enough.  I am expecting great things to come into mine and Casey's lives.  My expectancy is on Him and Him alone. We are running a race and even though the waves my crash around me I'm not going to give up.  I have a due season coming and this will be my combat year. 

Casey and I love to see where God is taking us.  This past week I finally graduated college, it took me a while, but I finally did it.  Casey is doing amazing in his real estate business and this week I have started looking for a job.  I want to work part time for now and maybe go up to a full time position.  We will see.  I have enjoyed learning many things on this journey and still have a ways to go, and this year will be our supernatural year.

Leading Up to Mother's Day!

Well I can already tell this is going to be a long post.

So Thursday was my lat day of school before I walk across the stage as a college graduate.  I am so excited, this is a huge accomplishment for me considering my son went to dance with Jesus in January.  It was a tough semester but it definitely helped me get through the days.  So after I turned in all my final projects I went to the chiropractor for an adjustment and Dr. Auzenne blessed me with a free adjustment for Mother's day.  How awesome!! So from there I went to get my hair done for summer and graduation and my hairdresser also didn't let me pay.  How blessed am I this Mother's day.
Here is my new hair do.

Now I wake up Friday morning with a bang on the door and there are a bouquet of flowers from Abbott's nursing agency thinking of me this Mother's Day.  That was very touching.  Here are the flowers.

Now I go on throughout my day and the mail comes in and there is a check for an amount that was extremely unexpected.  More than blessed for this Mother's Day.

So now it's time for me to go to the church and work for the afternoon.  I got all my stuff done and went over to Kidzway grabbed some papers that needed to go to recycling and instead of putting them straight in the pile I decided to go through them.  Guess what I found?  I picture that my son had colored who knows how long ago.  I was so excited I went to tell my friend Pastor Elizabeth and she said, " What a great Mother's Day gift!" I can't wait til my office is ready because I am framing it and putting it right on my desk where I will see it everyday for many days to come. Here is the picture my most wonderful son colored!






















So then I get home and my husband takes me out for my Mother's Day present to the TSO.  It was an amazing concert and I couldn't ask for a better hubby than the one I am so dearly blessed with.  God really knows what He is doing up there because He gave me an amazing man to grow up with.

Well now it is Saturday and I spent a great time with family.  My bro uncle bustin (JUSTIN) bought me, Amanda, and Casey lunch for Mother's Day.  My brother and his girlfriend got me a Mother's Day present.  A devotional I have been wanting by Beth Moore. And my husband bought me some really cool flowers from South Africa.  Finally to end the day we made our mom's their Mother's Day presents with their favorite chocolate candy.

So it's not even Mother's Day yet and people really took care of me.  I can't wait til the day comes and I have another little Wyatt baby running around so that they can color me pictures, but until that day comes I will lean on God to give me the love that my child gave me every day.  As I sit here writing this I have tears rolling down in both joy and sadness, just waiting til I get to meet our Sweet Jesus and see my dear Abbott again. I know that we serve a good God who is loving and cares for us deeply.  He has my name written on his hands, there not just written in a book, but they are also written on his hands.  I pray that the Holy Spirit continues to wrap his love around Casey and I and give us exactly what we need to make it through this season.  We have come a long way and we know in this valley we won't stay.  I will live my life with a purpose, to be joyful again. This is the prayer that is in my new devotional.
Lord God, how wonderful that we can live our days on this planet with a purpose- and how wonderful that when You call us to fulfill that purpose, You empower us as well! I ask for that power, Lord. Whether I'm living out my purpose by being a wife, a mother, or a friend for you may I find strength and joy.

"The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me;
your love, O Lord, endures forever-
do not abandon the works of your hands."
Psalm 138:8

Relay

This weekend Casey and I went to Canyon's Relay For Life.  Every time we drive towards Canyon my body cringes.  It just doesn't seem right that a town can make me dread going there.  I noticed that the last post that I put with Abbott still in my arms was how sick he was, then I jumped back into the blogging world months later trying to grasp the fact that I just spent my first holiday with out my baby boy.  And here it is again this weekend spending Mother's Day and really not feeling like a mother anymore because I don't have a baby to put to sleep or take to the park.  I think to myself that i really got all of this from one evening driving to Canyon.   But once Casey and I were at the Relay is was a special feeling.  Abbott had two luminaries in memory of him.  When I first saw these it made me so sad and I just cried in Casey's arms thinking first of all that he has one, and that it doesn't say in honor of, but it says in memory of.  Really, it says IN MEMORY OF ABBOTT WYATT.  It is still so hard to imagine that he is gone.  Our life has changed, our whole life has changed.  Casey and I got to light the luminaries and walk around the track for Abbott.  It was an amazing surprise to see Abbott's name in another town.  Just makes me realize how much this 2 1/2 year old boy impacted peoples lives.  Abbott will forever be in our hearts, when Casey and I do things to help us remember him, those things have really helped us.

So since Casey and I have had so much fun at Canyon's Relay I want to encourage you to come and have fun with Team Abbott at Amarillo's Relay For Life.  You can click on the link to sign up right now and help support our Team.  If you sign up before May 9th you will be able to go to The South YMCA for free for the month of MAY.  That sounds like a good incentive to me! 
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY11PL?team_id=909152&pg=team&fr_id=32277

We only have 39 more days left and Casey and I want it to be a special time, not only for us two but for all of you that helped fight the battle along side Abbott.  Abbott doesn't have to fight anymore and I am truly thankful for that, I do miss him dearly but I am happy for the life I had with him and continue to have.   He was truly an amazing boy that showed me so many things in life.  My life will be forever changed because of Abbott.

Easter was Amazing!!

So our first Easter without a baby came and gone.  I really don't think I had time to think about a lot it.  Casey and I went to church and listened to a wonderful service, we then went to Memory Gardens and visited Abbott.  I really thought that I wanted to have a picnic there but still wasn't ready. His head plate looks so pretty, we put his name, butterflies, and his picture on it.  After about 10 minutes there with Casey, Amanda, Kaymen, and myself we went to the park for a family Easter Egg Hunt.  We all sat on a picnic table and ate picnic food so we would be ready for the festivities.  The party started with Chubby Bunny, followed by the egg hunt (kids and adults), then an egg race, potato sack race, and ending with a pinata.  My cousin Ashley did an amazing job and while none of my immediate family came to celebrate, I'm learning more about this new normal life of mine. 

Monday came and Amanda and I decided to fix a car seat and stroller for a girl that had a preemie on Easter.  Her little girl Ava was born at around 2 pounds.  We died the travel system pink for little Ava and we pray that she gets to go home soon with her mommy and daddy.  I had a lot of fun fixing this up and had a precious time getting to meet this special family.  They got to hold Ava for the first time on Monday for about an hour and as a mother I bet that was thrilling.  Our family will be praying for Ava and I ask that you pray for her too.

I know this post was a bit choppy but Easter isn't just to celebrated on Sunday, it follows over to many days because our Savior is Risen and will be forever more.  This is Ava's parents and the travel system Amanda and I fixed up for them.

Heidi

The reason I Relay!

My reason I relay is for Abbott.  Abbott Russell Wyatt is my 2 1/2 year old son that has gone to be with Jesus.  Abbott died here on earth from a brain tumor called AT/RT.  He went through more than I can even imagine and I did everything with him.  This Easter is a huge remembrance for me because it is the first one without Abbott but also a reminder of the ultimate sacrifice Jesus did while dying on the cross for us.  I'm more thankful for that this year because Abbott is in Heaven rejoicing because of my/your Jesus.  If it weren't for Jesus My Abbott wouldn't be there in Heaven waiting on me.  I want to thank all of you for joining Team Abbott and keeping his Legacy going forever.  He changed many lives and he will continue to change more and more everyday.  I love my Abbott and can't wait til I am reunited with him, but until that day I will continue Abbott's Legacy forever by changing lives through the power of Jesus.

Starting the New Year right!

This is something I will do this year.  I love to be able to keep all of you updated through out our life.  Abbott has been better, a week before Christmas we found out that the cancer he had called AT/RT has come back and that he doesn't just have one tumor growing but he has 11 tumors growing all over his head.  It was definitely devastating news to find out especially before Christmas.  He has started his treatment that we were doing again but going three times a week and then doubling the dose.  It makes him quite tired but he is making it through.  Although just 2 weeks ago we had to rush him into emergency surgery to have a shunt put into his brain.  I never thought that once again I would be praying for life for my child to stay here on this earth.  But again God preformed miracles that we can't fathom on Abbott.  The good thing about this was finding out that the reason we had to have the surgery was because the tumors are dieing and it is causing the brain to swell and cause inflammation.  So yeah tumors are dissipating!!  On the other side though it has made Abbott very weak, he hasn't been able to bear any weight on his legs for about 3 weeks now and is having a hard time holding his head up.  But our faith is in the Lord and he shall deliver Abbott of these tumors and of cancer for the rest of his days.  I thank God everyday that he has placed Abbott into our lives, we are the only parents for him and to me that is great.  Well my little boy is siting in my lap and ready to go to bed AGAIN so goodnight.

 Heidi